Women’s Scripture.

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Juno created the world. She created Woman in her own image. Woman lived  in paradise with all the beasts. Woman was not quite content. Woman say to Juno ”all the animals have a male. I want a male as my companion.”

Juno said, ”Very well. I shall create you a male of your species as your helpmate.”

Juno took the middle breast from Woman’s chest. This left only two breasts – one on either side.

From this middle breast Juno fashioned Man. Then Juno breathed into Man and he came alive. Man was a bit bigger and stronger than Woman because she needed him to serve her. He was also much stupider.  Man and Woman fell in love. They frolicked and wore no clothes. There was no badness in them and so no sense of shame.

Juno set Woman over Man as his mistress. Juno said to this pair that they could parttake of any of the fruits of the forest but one. This fruit was from the Tree of Knowledge of Goodness an Wickedry.

Man spoke to a wicked beast. This evil creature told Man that he ought to sup upon the one fruit that was forbidden unto him for it tasted exceedingly well. Moreover, it would impart knowledge beyond his current comprehension. Man succumbed to these blandishments. He ate the fruit. All of a sudden he knew things he should not. He was embarrassed that his membrum virile was not as large as that of some animals. He covered himself

Woman saw him and asked why he hid behind a bush. He said he had eaten from the Tree and that made him realise things. The Woman reminded him that Juno had forbade them so to do. Man said that the fruit was surpassingly delectable and it would give her knowledge beyond her present understanding. He goaded her to try it. Finally she gave in to his cajoling. She took a bit. In an instant she knew things that made her feel inadequate. She doubted that her body was beautiful and wished to hide it. It seemed to be sinful.

Juno then saw that Man and Woman were hiding. Juno soon discovered the Truth. She banished them from the Garden.

The beast that tempted them was cursed to be the most reviled of all.

Man was punished for listening to Woman. He would lose his potency in middle age and die before woman. he would have cravings for women that he could never fulfill.

Woman was cursed by making her suffer PMT.

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Juno commanded that a Man had to be faithful to Woman and obedient. If he was not he would be penalised most severely.

Contrariwise – Juno reaffirmed that Woman would have dominion of Man as she did over dumb beasts. A Woman could copulate with as many Men as she wished and it would be no sin. She could capture them and make them her slaves but men had to be true to one Woman.

Women were to have education and be in communication with Juno. Men had no such intellectual capabilities and were to hearken to the orders of the fairer sex.

 

 

 

 

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About Calers

Born Belfast 1971. I read history at Edinburgh. I did a Master's at UCL. I have semi-libertarian right wing opinions. I am married with a daughter and a son. I am allergic to cats. I am the falling hope of the not so stern and somewhat bending Tories. I am a legal beagle rather than and eagle. Big up the Commonwealth of Nations.

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