Monthly Archives: April 2010

The Scots Cyclops


Dour Broon’s doon. He was trounced in the debate. I call Dr Brownie the Scots Cyclops. mAYBE This is why he is myopic! It is a little below the belt. I do not wish to upset those others who are one eyed.

 Dr Brown wheeled out overly rehearsed lines. These had no purchase on the debate. His humour is clangerous to coin a neologism. How desiccated his attempts at comic turns are. These are all scripted for him. It is the way he DISNAE tell ’em!

 A bit of isnide info. Cameroonie told me in 2003 that when IDS was prepping to face-off with Blur in the Commons they would practise and in the practice Dave would play Blair. A singularly inspired choice. The act has become him! Talk about methid acting –  Stanislavsky eat your heart out. Cameron learnt his trade in Leontyevsky Lane. He has lived his character. Is it like animal farm where on cannot distinguish hog from human at the end?

 Nick Clegg is held to have won the debate. He should not have been in it. It may help split the anti-Tory vote and as a Tory boy that is welcome.

 What mirkins Clegg’s parents must have been to chose a name that elides so –  Nicklegg – that’s what we should dub him. N’leg –  or Clog? He is half Nederlands after all. Maybe that was the reasoning behind it.

 I wish to lay emphasis on the fact that this blog is in no way anti-Caledonian. I write a few choice words in Broad Scots for mere mirth and not out of any wish to denigrate the North Britons.

More Moore


Oh yes –  Charming Charlie.

If I was being unkind I could interpret his article like this. In effect allowing child rape to go on unchecked on an international scale is preferable to making the Pope blush.

Doesn’t the church stand for right, morality, virtue, truth and justice? The church is supposed to be a bastion of morality –  doing the right thing however painful that may be. Did Jesus cop put when the going got tough?

But no this is a church of power and might –  of palaces and privilege. I am not anti-clerical and the church does a lot of good too and some clergy are very self sacrificing but there is a lot of hypocrisy there too.

Nonce bashing – Nuncio bashing.


Oh incidentally I have just remembered that ‘bash’ is now London street slang for wank but this pun is unintentional.

Anyway –  there has been coruscating criticism of the RC Church over the kiddie fiddling scandal. They accuse the RC church of institutionally failing to root out paedophilia. Time and again it as as covered up and not confronted. Ok, blatantly false allegations should not be entertrained but even when there was overwhelming evidence all too often nothing was done.

Yes there are some who are prejudiced against this church for religious or secular reasons.   ‘These accusations are motivated by prejudice’, say the prelates. These accusations are sometimes motivated by prejudice –  but they are still true.

One of the most obloquacious defences came from the Archbiship of New York. He said that exposing this outrage was like anti-Semitic propaganda under the Third Reich. What a load of horseshite.

 A few differences.  Number one the Protocols of the Elders of Zion is a forgery whereas the fact that tens of thousands if not more children were sexually abused by clergy is a fact acknowledge by even the RC church.

Nobody I have heard of has threatened violence against the church over this or banning it from proselytising or worship.

Sanctions against the Jews for their mere DNA were rather more stringent than asking the RC church to cough up some of its lucre.

It is the old reductio ad Hiterlerum. It is the resort of those who are so badly losing the argument –  I am like a Jew in the 30s and you are like a Nazi.

Is this the best defence they can come up with?

I read the Pope’s letter to the Papists of Ireland. Yes it is true when he says that there was abuse outside the church. It was refreshing to here him own up to the problem partly being that people were overly deferential to the chuch.

Charles Moore in the Spectator defended the Vatican on this issue. It was astonishing that he said the good name of the church was more important than tackling this humungeous problem. This is self-defeating. By not taking this cancer head on it was allowed to fester and spread and is a far bigger fiasco than it need have been if it had been dealt with centuries ago. This crime had always existed and always shall in all walks of life but the RC church is especially prone to it.

It is daft to pretend as Benedict XVI does that this is unconnected to celibacy and a lack of priestesses. The incidence among the clergy is much higher than in the general populace.

British happenings


 Dr Broon finally called the election. I liked seeing that robed official announce the dissolution of Parliament on the steps of the royal exchange.

 These leaders campaign away from the voters. As in the US they campaign for the media. They appear before hordes of the press corps with not an elector in sight.

Cameroon has been campaigning in casuals. I suppose he is trying to cast off the old fusty image. I was attracted to the Conservative and Unionist Party partly for sartorial reasons –  we are the pinstriped party. Cameron does not want to be seen as too posh.

I must admit that I have been impressed by the Conservative message over the past few days. The idea of slimming down the state and cutting waste appeals greatly.

 I am of a libertarian bent on many issues such as elf n’ safety. I do not go quite so far as to label my attitude ‘hate the state.’

Labour would have us believe that if the Conservatives take office then we shall all be reduced to illiteracy and death for want of basic medicines. It is all about schools n’ hospitals, innit? Blur went on about this so much because these are the only things left him by the EU but even the EU may grab these things. The EU has plans for a common curriculum and to co-rodinate on health issues where these cross borders. But every health issue crosses borders. Which disease is confined to one country alone? None.

By the way read James Delingpole on Cameron in the Spectator last week. He was an old mucker of Cameroon in Oxford. He exposed Cameron as having jettisoned most of what he believed in –  if he ever believed in anything beyond himself. Likewise Hitchens in the Spectator pointed out that the current Conservatitve party has ditched most of what is Conservative.

Yes one has to trim one’s sails to win and election but this is more like dismasting.

Cameron is a good communicator and he is smart. He is tactically astute but I will not accuse him of integrity of bravery. He really is the new Blair! What a back handed compliment he paid himself.

I met Cameron in 2003. A chum who worked for Cameron at Policy Xchange told me that Dave would rise fast. I did not think that fast.

I had Cameron come to the place I was teaching. He was shirty on the phone when I got his number down wrong. He asked me salary and was disparaging about it. In the pub he asked to wash his paws –  meaning take a shit. He asked for a coca cola –  he said it like that. For those of his ilk  ‘coke’ means something rather different.

A fascinating vignette, he applied for a job at Eton as he was about to graduate but then tore up his application. He had little idea what to do with his life.

Sam Cam is campaigning on her own? That only means showing her face and saying nothing political. She is blatantly being used by her party –  the party asks the media to show up to her events. I do not criticise this use of her. She is happy to go along with it –  I do not mean ‘use’ in the sense of exploit.

 Samantha definitely wins the leaders’ wives vote.

Scandal struck church


The Church of Rome has been engulfed by an unending scandal. It is indisputable that thousands of clergy around the world sexually abused children for centuries.  I was brought up in that church. I am a disbeliever. There is much in the church that I dislike but I recognise that there is plenty of good in the Catholic Church too.

Of course most clergy are innocent. They deserve the same presumption of innocence as everyone else. There are about half a million clergy and religious of the Roman Catholic Church in the world. Let us not tar them all with the same brush. The thing is we hear this daily list of clergy who have been found guilty of these crimes that when another one is accused part of me thinks –  here we go again, yet another paedo priest. But of course that is totally unfair.

There are many priests whom I like. These are very giving men and they are Christian in the best sense of the word. I know of 2 priests who were accused and the police found that there was no case to answer.

The paedophilia in the church is surely an open goal for Protestants who loathe the RC church as well as those of other faiths who despise it. Oddly, they seem not to have taken advantage of this suppurating wound.

The village that my parents inhabit from time to time had a priest in the mid 1990s who allegedly abused boys in a sexual manner. None of them said anything until a Down syndrome boy told on him. I suppose that Down’s children are not so easily silenced because of their subnormal intelligence –  they perhaps do not understand the threats that may be made against them. I do not know if these allegations are true are not. The priest was moved on pronto. So far as I know no legal action was taken. I was a teenager then and I remember being unshocked and not even thinking that the priest had done something terribly wicked.

 I would like everyone to calm down about the situation. This is not easy as it is a terribly emotive issue.

 Is this vice more widespread amongst the clergy than the laity? Almost certainly. Logic suggests that if one is not permitted a good outlet for one’s desires then one will find and evil outlet for them. Celibacy is impossible for almost everyone and it surely is partly responsible for this problem. Like W E H Lecky said it is, ‘proclaiming war on human nature.’ This no marriage rule came in only a millennium ago. There were married popes before it. It has been breached since –  allowing some African priests to wed when that was a strong expectation in their society and likewise accepting Anglican priests as converts and priests though these men had spouses.

Compensation is paid to victims. The trouble is this may attract some chancers.

The problem was in the old days the clergy were so exalted that nobody would listen to any allegations however well-founded.

 There is a good side to the church. It inspires great art and architecture. It runs charities. It had provided solace for the dying and bereaved. I see its services as performance art. I like the liturgy as a poetry recital and I like the music.

But yes it preaches nonsense. It wastes money. It has sanctified many atrocities. It was the enemy of free expression and inquiry. Uptight, moralistic, sanctimonious, killjoy, hypocritical, censorious, God bothering, effeminate, intolerant, waffling and grandmotherly. It will always crawl to tyrants and not stand up for truth and justice. It jusitifies this by expediency but surely religion is about doing the right thing? What if Jesus had chosen expediency over his mission? It was obscurantist and sought to return us to the Middle Ages. Part of me says, like Voltaire, ‘Ecrasez l’Infame!’

Its power has been broken. It is feeble, toothless and has next to no appeal among the young. People get holier as they age, or so it was till now. At this rate there will be no priests left in a century.

In the old days if a boy had no desire for girls he was told to be a priest. Of course many of themw ere gay and did not know. Queerdom was not talked about at all except in a condemnatory way.

 Well we need less hysteria. This crime has always been there and always shall.

The Church in the past covered this up because it could not be left with egg on its face. How shameful to value that over saving children from woeful abuse.

What I think is unjust is to lump Bishop Casey in with the nonces. He banged an adult –  fine. That is not the same league as kiddie fiddling.

Swinging is surely happier and mentally healthier than sexual repression.